medical conditions to logically explain all of these things. It doesn’t matter that I started starving myself at 10 years old and continued to do so for decades because an undiagnosed metabolic disorder made my body hold onto everything. It doesn’t matter that the same disorder covered me with pimples and unwanted hair in weird places starting at 11 years old and will presumably never let up. It doesn’t matter that I’m in constant pain from a collection of inflammatory, autoimmune, and neurological conditions because when I have to rest, people see a fat person being still and assume I’m lazy. It doesn’t matter that I have a pair of neurodevelopmental conditions that make me process sensory and social information differently, and which are debilitating in ways I’ll never be able to express with words. I’m just an awkward mess of a person on the Slow Down Calm Down Trust The Process With Sunflower Motivation Turtle Classic T Shirt all anyone will ever see. Most won’t bother to even try to know me. When I die, people will say “Well what did you expect? That’s what happens when you’re lazy and you don’t take care of yourself,” and only one or two of them will ever know just how hard I had to work to do exactly that every single day, just to survive. Caring for this body that causes me nothing but pain is now a full-time job that I can never, ever take a vacation or retire from. I feel you, OP, and I’m sorry. The Slow Down Calm Down Trust The Process With Sunflower Motivation Turtle Classic T Shirt dehumanization is heavy and it changes a person. I’d give anything to experience the Slow Down Calm Down Trust The Process With Sunflower Motivation Turtle Classic T Shirt of being typical but I also know it would only hurt me because then I’d be able to compare my life directly.
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I was a normal looking child but puberty turned me ugly. I started getting treated poorly since 13. Always being known as the Be axolotly don’t be salty be axolotl y cute shirt one and excluded by family. I had friends but they never respected me and easily left me to go off with someone else and they never had my back. Although people generally are not outright cruel, I deal with a lot of microaggressions. I’ve become a socially anxious person as a Be axolotly don’t be salty be axolotl y cute shirt . I had ptosis and had my right eye repaired when I was 19. I don’t know why the specialist only corrected the right, but I had ptosis on my left eye as well and the muscles on my left eye area/brow worked overtime to keep my eyes open. I also had double eyelid surgery, which made my eyes looked better for a few years. In 2018 when I noticed my left eyelid was larger than my right, I hastily and stupidly when back to the plastic surgeon who performed my double eyelid surgery to have my left eyelid lowered. The thing is it’s impossible to lower an eyelid and the Be axolotly don’t be salty be axolotl y cute shirt would have been to increase the height of my right eyelid to match my left. After the surgery to my left eyelid I have upper eyelid hollowness as he removed too much fat and A-frame deformity. Later that year I had bilateral ptosis repair. My eyelids are deformed now after those multiple surgeries and from certain angles makes me look like a mutant. I’ve contemplated suicide over it. People react negatively to me. I can understand strangers reacting negatively because they see what they see and don’t know my history, but it hurts seeing friends and family react negatively to me even though they know about my surgeries but forget, which is understandable but they can at least be honest and ask about it, rather than just reacting negatively. I’ve been avoiding socialising.
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